Exercise Trainers

Exercise trainers build muscle, stamina and rhythm.

The Exercise Trainers are common fitness footwear used by the ‘Ivrit Revival Movement, especially among fresh infantry recruits who are exercising or performing drills. While these shoes appear ordinary, they contain internal weights balanced by muscle amplifiers. Their swaddling fit feels instantly comfortable, and they’re proven to improve footwork and rhythm. The sneakers’ soles also quiet enough to let the wearer move silently and spy around.

The Exercise Trainers come from the גלר shoresh family, which governs feet, infantry, exercise, drill, familiarity, swaddling, rhythm and espionage.

Broadcast Bureaucrat with Sidrah Exoskeleton

The Broadcast Bureaucrat wears a Sidrah exoskeleton.

The Bavel Macrostructure determines broadcast programming out of an abandoned high school building along an office district avenue. Over there, bureaucrats direct communications to soldiers while keeping order, thwarting insurrections and crafting propaganda that worships Beli Ya’al.

These bureaucrats are normally weak and easily frightened. But they can survive and fight while wielding birch stylus batons and wearing Sidrah exoskeletons that enhance body strength and speed. The Sidrah armor’s transmitter also can scramble the brains of unwary foes. The gear’s effectiveness has gained the ‘Ivrit Revival Movement attention, prompting them to try to acquire some through a supplier.

The Broadcast Bureaucrat and the Sidrah Exoskeleton come from the דרש shoresh family, which governs broadcasting, programs, bureaucracy, high schools, offices, avenues, soldier ranks, insurrections, survival, rescue, birch, styluses, spines, transmitters and more.

Inktober 15: Ceremonial Ritual Helmet

The Ceremonial Ritual Helmet is popular at public military events.

INKTOBER DAY 15 (HELMET): When you have to look imposing yet dapper for that special event, the most dashing haberdasheries recommend the Ceremonial Ritual Helmet!

This heavily adorned piece of military regalia is worn by Holy Tongue Society members as well as ‘Ivrit Revival Movement troops, though usually in parades, pageants and other public celebrations, not during the thick of battle. The helmet imbues wearers with a certain gravitas and dignity that helps them concentrate while preparing to perform speech acts.

The Ceremonial Ritual Helmet comes from two neighboring shoresh roots with a common gematria of 169: קסדה and טקס. The first governs helmets and snails, and the second governs ceremonies, rituals, arrangements and adornments.

Inktober #2: Substitute Suit

The Substitute blocks shots.

Tired of getting your best clothes dirty or destroyed? Wish you didn’t pass away after that finishing blow landed? Now, from the makers of “Milhamah: Fighting Words,” there’s the Substitute Suit!

The Substitute Suit reproduces clones of itself that absorb stains, damage and more before vanishing. It even deflects slaughtering knives! It’s perfect for any quests into dangerous territory. (Spare parts not included.)

The suit comes with the חלף shoresh root, which broadly refers to changes, alternatives, money exchange, passing, suits, knives, swordfish, amoebas, blight and so much more.

Purchase your Substitute Suit now for 24 easy payments of 118, or *hit* that subscribe button to get more “Milhamah: Fighting Words” sketches, comics and games in your social media feed. DON’T DELAY!